How to Talk to Your Parents About Tutus

Ah, tutus—the frilly, bouncing wad of fabric that used to signify ballet class was nigh. Tutus have always been the quintessential symbol of grace, innocence and femininity. So of course, when planning your outfit for the rave, the small hand of your inner child shot up heavenward to make its bid for your long-lost friend.

“With the tutu comes the glitter, the neon eye color, the rainbow knee-highs, and all other manner of YAS QUEEN to make you feel like a goddamned peacock.”

For my first rave, I didn’t have the slightest idea of what to wear or how. That didn’t stop me from making a straight shot to the costume/ballet shop my parents used to take me to as a kid and grab the brightest, reddest tutu I could find. That was the one item I knew I needed beyond anything else for this night. You know why? Because it was pretty. Because it made me feel like a cute little Barbie doll. And because my ass was going to look hot as fuck. That’s right: ASS. The tutu is the perfect way to walk that glittering line between “Look how sexy my ass is” and “Gee whiz, aren’t I cute and innocent?” The tutu is always the answer; that is why, whenever you see a girl walking around in a tutu, you know the rave has arrived.

Yeah, it might be a little on the easy-breezy side, but it’s a fashion culture born of reckless abandon and a need for bright and pretty things, so it’s beautiful. You slap that tutu on, and you automatically know that the time for you to live is now. Rain or shine, that tutu is tickling the tops of your ass cheeks, so the night is going to be lit AF. And with the tutu comes the glitter, the neon eye color, the rainbow knee-highs, and all other manner of YAS QUEEN to make you feel like a goddamned peacock on roids.

In short, it’s the gateway product to a real good time. Wear it with attitude, wear it with pride, and above all, wear it with a very sexy pair of undies.