iQ: Paul Woolford

We capture a mental fingerprint of some of our musical and cultural heroes and preserve it in cyber-amber for the wonderment of future generations. This is the Insomniac Questionnaire.

What was your favorite toy as a child, and when and why did you stop playing with it?
LEGO—I was absolutely obsessed with building things out of it. I started off sticking to the instructions and making what was on the box, and gradually as I got more of it, I just made whatever I decided to in the moment, from cars to space stations to a whole city. Endless fun.

What is the best advice you’ve ever received? Did you take it?
Don’t eat yellow snow. Solid advice.

What part of your day do you look forward to most?
Mornings and evenings are the best moments; that’s where the magic is.

What’s the best time you’ve ever had without spending money?
I’m not sure I can go into that here.

What is your most treasured possession?
Generally speaking, we shouldn’t get too attached to possessions, but I’d be lying if I didn’t say my house.

What is your favorite word?
This changes all the time. Currently, it’s “vulgarian.”

Do you owe an apology to anyone?
Most of my friends, for being unreachable 95 percent of the time.

When is the last time you were really scared?
Many years ago, on an unbelievably turbulent flight on a 20-seat plane over the Dolomite Mountains. I wondered what the high-pitch noise [was], until I realized it was actually MYSELF making it…. pretty hairy.

What’s the last sound you would want to hear before you die?What is the last thing you googled?
“Is Jodey Kendrick actually Aphex Twin?”

The sound of me switching off the lights a couple of hours before.

Do you have any recurring dreams or nightmares?
I used to have really bad dreams about incredibly turbulent flights. These stopped gradually over the years, and I actually love flying. Once a year, I have the classic DJ anxiety dream about playing a really important show and the record is running out, but that’s it these days. I sleep like a baby.

How do you measure success?
I measure it by how happy the people around me are. If they are happy and trouble-free, then I know we are in the right place.

If you could have one magical/superpower, what would you want, and why?
Teleportation would be nice!

Have you ever had a brush with the paranormal or supernatural?
No.

What do you remember about your first kiss?
The atmosphere.

What four words best describe you?
Determined, enquiring, driven, and silly.

What’s the last impulsive thing you did?
The banal and honest answer is that I’m permanently changing travel plans—I actually try and leave it as late as I can before making them, in order to keep things as open as possible. Everything revolves around maximizing the amount of studio time I get, so quite frequently, things change on a whim. Proper boring answer. I bet you wanted to read something like: “I went out to post a letter and ended up dressed as Elvis with a lizard up my ass in a casino in Vegas.”

Do you have a pet? If not, what is your ideal pet, and what would you want it to do in an ideal world?
I don’t, but I have been seriously considering getting a dog lately—ideally, probably a really well-behaved greyhound. All it needs to do is get looked after 24-7.

What is your strongest or best personality trait?
Loyalty.

Do you believe in any conspiracy theories or urban legends?
I’m really nosey, so there’s very little I actually take at face value. We all have a responsibility to actually try and know about the world we live in. That said: There’s so much nonsense out there, especially now that algorithms dictate what we see and read. Most people actually get their news from Facebook, which is horrifying, but any and every news network has bias, so really we have no choice. If you engage you don’t know what is true, and if you don’t then you are not informed. So we’re basically fucked. Sleep well!